Once you’ve learned how to overcome low self esteem by removing mental obstacles that make it hard for you to value yourself, you’ve empowered yourself to easily think highly of yourself, which is how you increase your self esteem very quickly.
After all, by appreciating that it’s ok, great, valid, and beneficial for you to stop seeing your life negatively, and to instead see a lot of positive value in your life, regardless of whether anyone else does, this puts you in a very strong position to have high, rock solid self esteem that remains no matter what anyone else thinks of you.
At this point, it’s simply a matter of learning how to have a high self esteem quickly by seeing lots of positive value in your past, present, and future.
The result of increasing your self esteem in this way is that you will naturally be more self confident, more successful, have better, more enjoyable social interactions with other people, and you’ll also find it much easier to be happy and depression-free.
How to have high self esteem by valuing your past
To have high self esteem, see lots of positive value in your past, including everything you’ve learned, gained, and achieved.
You previously learned how seeing no value (or even negative value) in your past naturally leads to feelings of regret and failure.
Right now, appreciate that another tragedy of seeing little or no value in your past is that the life you’ve lived literally becomes worthless to you.
The result is that instead of feeling great about the life you’ve lived, and everything you’ve learned, gained, achieved, and experienced along the way, you feel either empty or miserable, so life isn’t as enjoyable or worth living. And, of course, you have lower self esteem, because you’re not valuing the life you’ve lived.
So moving forward, make sure to focus on and see tremendous positive value in everything great thing you’ve experienced, achieved, learned, gained, and benefited from in life.
And if you think about things that some people might consider ‘negative’ (like losing a job, or ending a relationship), focus on everything you’ve learned and gained from these types of experiences, which has naturally helped you become better and stronger, and has therefore naturally helped you create a better and brighter future for yourself.
In such a way, you can see positive value in your life to be thankful for, no matter what aspect of your life that you think about. And by doing so, you increase your sense of self worth, self confidence, feel better and happier about yourself, and you also find it easier to become and remain depression-free.
How to get high self esteem by valuing the present
To have high self esteem, see lots of positive value in how you presently are, and appreciate all your capabilities and everything you have to offer this world.
Also, accept everything about yourself that you are less pleased with, knowing that you can learn from these things and improve upon them. Indeed, this is one of your valuable capabilities to be thankful for and appreciate.
If you’re struggling with depression, you likely have spent a great deal of time examining yourself and your life through a very harsh, self-critical lens, which naturally makes you feel worthless, and makes you struggle with lower self esteem and low self confidence.
So right now, it’s important for you to learn that it is literally of no value for you to view yourself in this very self-critical, negative way. Instead, there’s a tremendous amount of value in viewing yourself through a very positive, encouraging lens.
To appreciate this, just imagine how you might wish other people saw you: all your good traits, everything you have going for you, and even areas where you’ve messed up or haven’t done as well, that’s still ok. Some of those “imperfections” just add character, and what’s important is that you can always improve your life, and learn, gain, and benefit from everything.
Right now, you can adopt this very positive view of yourself, even if no one else does. This means that you can quickly become your own best friend, rather than your own worst enemy, simply by seeing yourself in a positive, contstructive, accepting light, no matter how anyone else sees you.
Indeed, this is how to keep your self esteem high no matter what happens in life.
So be sure to appreciate every unique thing you have going for you, like your personality, sense of humor, intelligence, personal experiences, your interest in others, and on and on and on. You can appreciate yourself as much as you want: the sky is the limit, so don’t hold back.
And whenever you become aware of a negative view of yourself that lowers your self esteem and makes you feel bad about yourself, immediately replace it with a valid positive view of yourself that increases your self esteem and makes you feel better about yourself.
Examples of how to build high self esteem by changing the way you think about yourself
Remember, just like it’s valid to see as glass as half empty or half full, it can be valid to see yourself negatively and have low self esteem, or valid to see yourself positively and have higher self esteem.
So the name of the game is to always eliminate any negative views of yourself that create low self esteem, no matter how valid or true they might be, and to replace them with valid positive views of yourself that boost your self esteem and make you feel better about yourself. This is just an extremely intelligent, beneficial thing to do, every way you look at it.
For example, let’s say you think a negative thought like “I have no friends”, which naturally decreases your self esteem and makes you feel bad about yourself.
You could appreciate that this is false, and that you actually do have friends, and instead start thinking “I have some friends, and I am thankful for them”. This naturally increases your self esteem and self confidence.
But even if it’s true that you have no friends, so what? Instead of thinking “I have no friends”, you can think the valid, true, positive thought “I can make friends”, and this thought will also increase your self esteem and self confidence.
Similarly, let’s say you find yourself thinking a thought like “I’m fat”, and you feel awful and miserable as a result.
Right away, be aware that this is a useless, negative thought that works against you, and that it lowers your self confidence, self esteem, and makes life less worth living. It might turn out to be a false thought, but remember, even if it’s a true negative thought, being true doesn’t make it worth thinking!
Instead of thinking “I’m fat”, you can always find a valid, true positive thought to think instead, like “I can accept and be happy with the way I look, no matter how much I weigh”. Or, if you find you don’t believe that, you can think “I can lose weight and become thinner and healthier”.
The idea, here, is that you can always find a valid positive way to think about yourself that makes you feel better, stronger, more confident, and more valuable, and by doing so, you naturally replace low self esteem with high self esteem. (To make it even easier to improve your thinking, you can use the Positive Thinking Tool.)
How to develop high self esteem by valuing the future
To have high self esteem, see lots of positive value in your future, and be optimistic as you appreciate everything you have going for you.
Once you start seeing a lot of positive value in your past and present, including all of your capabilities, it becomes much easier for you to see a lot of positive value in your future, and to start looking forward to it more and more.
And guess what? Feeling excited and energized thinking about the future naturally makes you feel extremely happy, and helps you become and remain depression-free very fast.
Remember, as the placebo effect for depression proves, being more optimistic about your future is one of the most powerful factors for getting rid of depression. Indeed, many people stop being depressed just by becoming more optimistic and hopeful that they can stop being depressed and become happy.
Right now, an important thing for you to appreciate is that if you find it difficult to see a lot value in your future, including all the wonderful, positive things that you can experience, achieve, learn from, gain, and enjoy, it’s likely because you’re see little or no value in your past or present.
After all, if you think that there’s been no value in your past or present, then it’s naturally “hard” for you to believe that there will be a lot of positive value in your future to look forward to.
But if you develop a very positive view of your past and present, and appreciate all your capabilities, and all the wonderful things you’ve achieved, learned, gained, and experienced along the way, it makes it very easy for you to anticipate and expect a wonderful future that gets better and better.
Of course, this positive view of your future naturally makes you feel like your life is very valuable and worth living. This naturally increases your self esteem and self confidence, makes you a happier person overall, and makes it much, much easier for you to become and remain depression-free.
So starting today, be sure to focus on all the positive, wonderful things that you can achieve and experience in your future. And even if there’s some outcomes that you might not prefer, know that you can accept and handle them constructively, so that you learn, gain, and benefit from them in some way.
This enables you to see positive value in your future, no matter what aspect you look at, which makes your life even more valuable and worth living the more you think about it. In this way, your self esteem and self confidence naturally keep growing the more you think about your future.
How to make your self esteem higher: 4 steps
You can replace low self esteem with high self esteem very quickly. After all, it’s just a matter of changing your thinking, and you’ve learned how to do that.
This means you don’t have to wait days, weeks, months, or even years to stop struggling with low self esteem and enjoy having high self esteem. Instead, you enjoy having very high self esteem today, simply by following these 4 simple steps:
- See no value in feelings of worthlessness or low self esteem, and instead see lots of value in valuing yourself and having high self esteem. (This makes it easy for you to let go of negative ways of thinking that create low self esteem, and to instead think in more positive ways that create high self esteem.)
- Accept that it is ok, great, valid, and beneficial for you in every way to value yourself and have high self esteem, regardless of whether anyone else values you or not, and appreciate that you don’t need anyone else’s support, acceptance, help, or approval to enjoy having high self esteem. (Indeed, other people can’t stop you from having high self esteem, even if they wanted to.)
- Focus on all the positive value in your life, including your past, present, and future. Appreciate all of the positive things you’ve learned, gained, achieved, and experienced during the course of your life, all of your positive qualities, capabilities, and what you have to offer the world, and focus on all of the great possibilities you can achieve and experience in the future, knowing you can learn, gain, and benefit from anything.
- For any less preferable aspects of your life, know without a doubt that you can accept and handle them in a constructive way, and focus on all the positive things you’ve learned and gained from them, which has helped make you and your future even stronger and better. (Also, always appreciate your capabilities to improve your life and situation.)
By following these steps, you will naturally find it easy to value yourself, and to see positive value in your life no matter what aspect you look at and examine. The result of seeing so much value in your life is that you naturally have higher self esteem, self confidence, and you naturally find life much more enjoyable and worth living.
And, of course, you also find it much easier to become and remain depression-free. So right now, make sure that you complete these steps to achieve a much higher degree of self esteem and a life that’s better and more enjoyable for you in every way.
Next: How To Stop Hating Yourself →
You are here:
Section 9 Lessons:
- How to let go of regret & be thankful
- How to deal with failure & feel more successful
- How to overcome lack of self confidence fast
- How to overcome low self esteem and depression
- How to have high self esteem fast
- How to stop hating yourself